Improving the co-parenting experience with a toxic ex

On Behalf of | Nov 18, 2019 | Child Custody & Visitation

Co-parenting with a toxic person can be incredibly frustrating. Florida residents may be interested in learning how they can be a good parent, maintain their sanity, and ensure that their children have access to at least one responsible adult after a divorce.

It is important for a person to have two non-negotiables throughout the entire co-parenting experience. These are looking out for the best interests of their children and maintaining their own personal integrity. If a person can be committed to these two things, it will help them to better navigate their ex-spouse’s efforts to throw them off course.

This does not mean that all types of communication are acceptable. A person has control over how and when they respond to an ex-spouse. The goal is to parent the children, not hash out old problems from the marriage. Communication regarding the children should be business-like. It may be better to communicate through email or text message as opposed to face-to-face or over the phone communication.

Recognizing certain triggers or fears that cause an ex-spouse to respond in an escalated way can help a person to steer conversations in a direction that will keep the situation calm. When dealing with a toxic co-parent, the other parent does have some control over interrupting unhealthy dynamics in the relationship. It is important to never forget the goals, looking out for the children’s best interests and maintaining personal integrity.

It is good to document everything in a journal. This journal would include communication with the co-parent, breaches of agreements, and dates. It may prove helpful in a legal setting. Some have turned to an attorney when they have questions about child custody or feel that their current co-parenting situation is not in the child’s best interests. An attorney may be able to provide legal advice or even represent their client in court.