Few things complicate family law issues faster than parenting disputes. Sometimes, co-parents have the same values and can put their children first. Many times, at least one adult in the family struggles with shared custody arrangements. People who are bitter about the end of a relationship or who simply don’t like the obligations of shared custody might decide to try to push the other parent out of the family.
Attempts at parental alienation aim to achieve exactly that. One parent slowly and methodically manipulates the children. They talk to them inappropriately about the other parent. In some cases, they may go so far as to actively interfere in the parenting schedule for the family. Those actions can lead to real damage to the parent-child relationship. Parental alienation can also do long-term psychological damage to the children involved.
Not only do they lose out on an important relationship during their formative years, but they may also grow to resent or mistrust the parent who alienated them from the other parents in the family. The family courts can intervene in scenarios involving parental alienation, but those making allegations in court need proof.
How can one parent establish in family court that the other wants to damage their relationship with their children?
With electronic records
People are surprisingly comfortable sending text messages, emails and social media messages to other people describing inappropriate conduct. One parent might tell the other that they will never see the children again.
They might send messages canceling and shortening parenting time. They may also send over accusatory or highly negative messages targeting one parent. Screenshots of inappropriate messages and social media posts can help establish that one parent may have intentionally tried to interfere in the bond the other has with the children.
With written records
Perhaps the children return from their time with the other parent reciting a laundry list of complaints. Documenting the negative statements that they repeat after hearing them from the other parent could help establish an attempt to alienate the children.
There may also be adults who witness the negative talk who can help affirm that one parent has tried to manipulate how the children perceive the other parent in the family. Keeping personal records of what the children say and when can be important.
So can proof of canceled or shortened parenting sessions. Proof that one parent has repeatedly diminished how much time the other gets to spend with their children can make it clear that they do not follow the custody order. A parent who cancels the other’s time typically needs to give them an opportunity to make up those lost hours. Records of negative talk and interrupted parenting schedules can help demonstrate an inappropriate pattern of behavior.
Parents do not have to accept attempts at parental alienation. Going back to family court can be an appropriate response to one parent’s attempt to harm the other’s relationship with their shared children.
